Tanvi Lal reflects on a deceptively simple idea: the stories we tell ourselves about our past often become the strongest barriers to our future. Tanvi Lal draws from a key insight in The Courage to Be Disliked, where Adler challenges the comforting belief that our past dictates our actions. Instead, Tanvi Lal emphasizes a more uncomfortable truth, that people frequently use their past as justification for inaction. This shift in perspective is not just philosophical; it is deeply practical, especially in the workplace.
Tanvi Lal, in her role as Head of People at AppsForBharat, occupies a front-row seat to human behavior at work. Tanvi Lal observes how individuals carry invisible narratives shaped by prior experiences, moments of mistrust, missed opportunities, or perceived failures. Tanvi Lal notes that these narratives quietly shape decisions: a person once overlooked hesitates to step forward again, while someone criticized for initiative becomes cautious to a fault. Tanvi Lal points out that these patterns are not imposed externally as much as they are internally reinforced.
What makes Tanvi Lal’s reflection particularly relevant is her focus on locus of control. Tanvi Lal highlights how many professionals unknowingly operate from a belief that outcomes are controlled by external forces. This mindset creates a subtle dependency on validation, permission, or ideal conditions. Tanvi Lal suggests that recognizing this tendency is the first step toward reclaiming agency. It is not about dismissing past experiences but about refusing to let them define present choices.
Tanvi Lal also explores a more nuanced tension, the difference between seeking recognition and pursuing contribution. Tanvi Lal explains that these motivations often appear identical in behavior. Both can drive hard work, ambition, and results. However, Tanvi Lal distinguishes them by their emotional foundation: recognition depends on external response, while contribution is internally anchored. Tanvi Lal argues that confusion between the two is a major source of dissatisfaction in otherwise successful careers.
In growth-stage companies, Tanvi Lal notes, this distinction becomes even more critical. Tanvi Lal describes environments where uncertainty is constant, feedback is delayed, and clarity is often incomplete. In such conditions, Tanvi Lal observes that individuals driven by recognition may struggle, as validation is inconsistent. On the other hand, Tanvi Lal finds that those motivated by contribution adapt more effectively because their sense of purpose is not tied to immediate acknowledgment.
Tanvi Lal frames this as a quiet but decisive question: are you doing the work because it matters, or because you want to be seen doing it? Tanvi Lal suggests that the answer to this question shapes resilience, adaptability, and long-term satisfaction. Tanvi Lal does not present this as an easy realization but as an ongoing internal dialogue that professionals must engage with.
Ultimately, Tanvi Lal returns to Adler’s central argument, that change is always available. Tanvi Lal acknowledges the resistance this idea creates, as accepting it means taking responsibility for one’s current state. Tanvi Lal underscores that staying the same is not passive; it is an active choice repeated over time. This perspective reframes growth not as a distant goal but as an immediate option.
Tanvi Lal leaves us with a grounded takeaway: progress begins when we stop outsourcing control to our past and start making deliberate choices in the present.
